Saturday, August 2, 2014

Who Rescued Who?

Sorry for the break between blogs... This summer has been very difficult for me to get into a rhythm.  The business is going great, I am in the spot where I need to hire help, but am not ready to do it yet.  This is a great sign of growth and I am very proud.  There are lots of good things goin' on... and lots of bad things... but mainly...

I miss my mommy.

I know we all experience these losses of loved ones who are close to us.  It is experience gained, lessons learned, and another reason to lean on our Savior. 

But I still miss my mommy. 

I miss the phone calls discussing nail polish colors, meal choices and her letting me go on and on about my latest adventures.  She always said that Lucille Ball had nothin' on me. (I always chose to take that as a compliment)  Mr. Star has mentioned to me several times lately to... well... "please, please stop talking".   I am not offended, things have not changed for him... 
but I think he forgets that my chit chat buddy is gone.

Last week my daughter flew away to visit friends, my son went to scout camp and I was eerily free of any obligations.  So Bella and I went to the beach together. 
Girl's getaway selfie!
 See Bella and I have a bond.  I adopted her a couple of months ago... right after my mom died.  My excuse was that Brown Dog needed a partner to help calm him down.  But in all honesty, I think I needed the new partner.  Bella had recently lost her owner and at 9 years old found herself without a family.  So I tracked her down and "rescued" her.  And I found myself with an overweight, tired rottweiler who was just plain sad.  Right away I knew I had to take her in.

Bella missed her Daddy.

Bella missed her Daddy, and I missed my mommy.  

So we are healing together.  

I am doing my best to fulfill her needs of safety, companionship and protection.  
Who rescued who?
And in turn, she is doing the same for me. 

It's ok to miss the ones we love.  One of my dear friends who has lost a child and recently her mother, told me that it's "ok and your life goes on, but it's just going to always be different".

And isn't that the way it's supposed to be?  If we stay the same our whole lives we are never growing and changing, and frankly we don't even want that do we? 

So Bella and I are changing... and healing... AND we are still having our adventures. (I like to think that my Mom watches my silly antics and shakes her head while laughing at me.)  We stay busy because we like it, but it also helps us cope.  We count our blessings together.  We make fun of Brown Dog together.  We have each other.  
Animals were put here to teach us life lessons and if we listen, truly listen, we learn.  

We learn and grow and continue to go on, 
 just in a different way.